I’ll Keep Running To You

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It was only when you turned away
That I remembered why I married you for
And here, now, I’ve done it again
I sought you out because I needed a savior
Not a lover, but a Christ
Not a wife, but a bearer of my many crosses
I would have stripped you, beaten you
And placed a crown of thorns upon your head
Called you despicable, wretched, and heathen
Before your friends and loved ones
 
And you would have taken it all in
Taken it all so well
And when
If
I ever let you down from the bloody stick
You’d do it all over again
Because you loved me
 
I wasn’t loved by anyone before you
I never found a home in anything before you
In the past I’d bury myself in bosoms
But that only lasted as long as I did
And when the night turned to day, I’d pay
They’d leave, and I’d have to start all over
I could never survive that way, then you came
My way, and I’ve never been the same
But I couldn’t keep myself from revealing itself
And the venom within reared up and took me
I am neither man or monster
But the passions of each combined
With timid, childlike sways of emotion
 
I am failure, failed, and failing
You can keep coming back to me
But I’ve already sold myself to the flame
Opening the door will only reveal
Different personas of a face
All the same

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