Bleached

I’m full of light and loneliness

Words and worries

Good intentions and concerning dreams

Sex, alcohol, money, and lies inside

Angel and devil is him and I

Walk a mile in my shoes, and you feel shame

The time I stole, the times I lied, even now

I hide behind poems and hope you’ll forgive

I abused myself as a kid, and when I turned

The teen wanted to kill himself

I drank bleach, I let the flame on too long

The monotonous drone of my song grew on

But each attempt failed, driving me deeper

I wasn’t a risk or a post-hype sleeper

Devereaux was the biggest bust imaginable

I’ve tried to fill the void with people and sleep

Sleeping with people and sleeping on others

Her kisses sucked the sin right out

Shoved back when she found someone new

Love is my poison and my penance

Growing older but my hands feel colder

Each day I feel lonelier and silence

Is the only thing that kisses me awake

They’re speaking, but in my head

I feel like I’m drinking bleach all over again

It might be a shock to some, but my path

Hardly feels done, yet I worry I’m finished

I walk the dark alleys, looking for the words

The poems are wrath and a refuge

Of a kid still holding to the senseless

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